I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but I'm breaking up with you.
That's right, our long-standing relationship is over. . . Done. . . History. . . Finito. . .
After all of the time and money I have invested in you, I didn't think you would disappoint me.
But you have.
Do you know how I felt when I reached for you after a long, tough day (aren't they all) only to be disappointed? When, after struggling to Open flap A and Remove flap B, I pulled your little spigot out from your roly-poly belly only to find that something had gone terribly wrong with your fermentation process? Do you realize the pain I was forced to endure while drinking my husband's red?
And do you have any idea, Mr. Fish Eye in a Box, the "udder" discomfort I felt when I was forced to pull the insides out of your box, open your spigot and squeeze the equivalent of four bottles of wine down the drain of my kitchen sink?
Devastating!
I know that life may never be the same without your best customer, my friend, but you'll have to muddle through somehow.
I have.
You see that circle on the front of the box? That's A Mom on Spin's official seal of approval. I swear!
