Itsy-bitsy, you might say . . .
The other Thing about Thongs is that my daughters own a lot of them. . .
So just yesterday, as I was folding a load of laundry (I'll leave you to guess for which daughter - for only one is still at home doing laundry and we are talking about unmentionables here . . . ) I counted 19 thongs among the myriad of t-shirts, towels, and gym shorts . . .
And this little exercise, my friends, led me to ask (and attempt to answer) the following questions. . .
- How many thongs can you carry in one hand? 19. I think I reached the limit with those 19 thongs.
- How many thongs can you fit between your toes? If I assign two per opening that gives us 16. The answer is 16.
- How many thongs can you eat with a Klondike bar? Good God above, I hope none. . .
- How many thongs could you smush in a Starbuck's Vente cup? 27. Final answer.
- How many could you wear on your head at one time? None. My head is definitely bigger than my daughters' hineys, so it would be all stretched out! by the time I returned it, and I wouldn't want to risk those consequences. . .
and, last but not least. . .
- If you were stranded on a desert island with only a thong, could you use it? Perhaps as a sling shot, but I'd rather have her sticky boobs as flotation devices . . .
So there you have it, my friends, the Thing(s) about Thongs.