Friday, September 11, 2009

Just When I Thought it Was Safe to Go Back in the Water. . .


She was bound to do it sometime.

Bust the honeymoon phase, that is. . .

You see, in a strange combination of irrational trust, unearned confidence, and good old-fashioned impulse shopping, I purchased a brand new Starbucks travel mug as a back-to-school gift for Ponzi. And - at the risk of significant danger to my own life and limb - I purchased some Starbucks Tassimo pods to go with it.

Because, my friends, I thought it was safe to go back to the Tassimo.

The very same Tassimo coffee maker that her sisters used with wild abandon and - consequently - had been declared off limits! by Mr. Drip Dry. And I, the shopper of the family, had been forbidden to refill the corresponding coffee supply until the two of us were both safely ensconced in nothing short of an assisted living facility and were assured that we could afford what would be our now-limited "lifetime" of pod purchasing. (You get it? That's a fancy/funny way of saying that those freaking pods are expensive and one of Ponzi's sisters - who shall remain nameless - had been drinking about five cups of espresso a day, leaving Drip Dry no recourse but to shut down the whole operation.)

Literally. No drips from the coffee maker . . .

Dry as a bone. . .

And, from that moment on, we were all expected to use the boring, outdated, outmoded, and outclassed, Mr. Coffee to brew our morning's lifejuice.

And, in what will go down in the no-good-deed-goes-unpunished-by-a-teenage-daughter annals, for the past two mornings Ponzi has had the ultimate gall to use not one - but TWO - of those Tassimo pods to fill her travel mug. Wait. I stand corrected! It's more like one-and-a-half to fill that cup. That's right! She makes two cups, pours one-and-a-half of them into her new mug, and then proceeds to commit the most egregious sin of waste by leaving the remaining half-cup behind - sending Mr. Drip Dry into a tailspin from which he may never recover!

Note this day, folks.

The day that the coffee maker. . . the pods. . . the mug. . . and A Mom on Spin. . . go into hibernation until retirement . . .