Thursday, October 16, 2008

Testosterone in my house!

Quick! Open the windows!

I detect testosterone in my house.

By now you know I have three teenagish daughters - and the dog and the cat are of the female persuasion as well.

So let me tell you, we are not accustomed to toxic levels of testosterone in this household (excluding, of course, the daughter with polycystic ovarian syndrome, but hormone therapy has taken care of that.) Anyway, when it comes to "manly" vibes, my husband is usually alone here.

Until the day that my two younger daughters moved from the all-girls' Catholic school to the local high school.

I dare say that I have seen more teenage boys in this house in the past seven days than in my seven years of mothering teenage girls combined.

I'm not quite sure what to do with them.

Do I feed them? High-five them? Put ESPN on 24/7 for them?
Do they like Pirate's Booty, Fresca, or lemon chiffon yogurt?
Can I ask them to take their shoes off upon entering the house? And could I stand the odor if I did?

On this particular evening they have gained entrance to the house under false pretenses anyway. Can Sam come over and write his paper? His computer is broken. Now, what mother would say no to that? So in come Sam and his friend (the other Sam- he just wants to come in for a few minutes) fresh from dinner at Taco Bell, turn on the big-screen t.v., and all start watching a movie. As far and I can tell, there is no evidence of anyone writing a paper!

Advice would be appreciated.